It’s amazing how God never gives us more than we can handle all at one time in life. Sometimes it might feel as if we’re being overloaded, but I know God is always in control.
Lately I’ve been thinking quite a bit about the events that transpired in my life this past year, and I feel like my eyes are finally opened wide to the truth. It was a long and slow process, but God gave me access to just the right amount of information along the way, while also shielding me from any knowledge that I wasn’t emotionally ready to handle.
For instance, had God revealed all of my ex-husband’s secrets to me at once, I might never have been willing to attempt reconciliation with him. Had I not tried to forgive him and move forward in the marriage, I may have always harbored regrets about what “could have been” if I had been able to forgive. As it stands, I have peace of mind in the knowledge that I did everything I could to hold my family together. I hope that this will mean something to my children someday. I know it means something to me now.
For the past year I have mourned the loss of my marriage, but those days are behind me. I saw a lot of untapped potential in our union and wished it could have come to fruition, but the truth is, that was probably never going to happen. I now realize that we are and always were two very different people with opposing values, morals and beliefs. Had he not cheated on me less than five years into our marriage, I might have spent the next fifty years of my life growing in bitterness and discontent. While I’ll never be able to condone what he and his mistress did, I will actually benefit from their transgressions. I’m now free to live a happier life. I’m free to find a life mate who will love me for exactly who I am, not for who he wishes I would be. What a surprising and wonderful gift to be given. What evidence that God can bring any situation together for good. I’m looking forward to who and what God will bring into this next season of my life.
Awesome! I am happy to hear you are feeling this way. I know from reading your posts that any man that comes along will be lucky to have you and your children in his life.
God Bless!
Why thank you! What a nice thing to say.
I’m continually inspired by not only your ability to forgive and move forward for the sake of yourself and your family, but also your ability to look for the silver lining. Your children have such a wonderful role model in their lives. I hope we can soon catch up in person. Miss you!
Thanks, Erin. Your comment gave me the warm fuzzies.
I’d love to catch up in person someday soon, too. Why don’t you come visit me in IL? Remember how fun it is!?